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7 Reasons To Watch The Olympics

Yes, the Olympics are to sports, what Fall Out Boy is to punk. We haven't changed our minds. In fact with all the news about internet access being restricted and dissidents being jailed, we're even less excited about the games. Nonetheless, as a "fair and balanced" national online database for local sports and recreation, we'd like to single out a few things we are looking forward to.

1. Yao Ming's Shoes
Yao Ming's Olympic Shoes

2. Pissing Off The Chinese Government
Someone is going to win a medal and bust out a Tibetan flag. The Chinese government will shit itself for a few minutes and then try to the remove the dissenting athlete. Costas will throw a fit, and the whole world will be watching. We're hoping it's an American, wearing the Tibetan flag around his shoulders, holding some fire and a machine gun. Megan Fox will be there too. Naked.

3. Gymnasts
Gymnasts are good looking. A bit muscular, but good looking. Plus, we've always been suckers for a good floor routine.

4. Favre Relief
With the media focused on the games, we can expect a break from the round-the-clock Brett Favre news that has dominated sports news for the past few weeks. Though we wouldn't be surprised if Favre suddenly cried foul about being excluded from the US Handball Team. For further information on Favre, click here.

5. Architecture
The stadium and aquatic center in Beijing are two of the coolest structures ever built. And unlike Athens in 2004, they were finished months ago. It's amazing what an autocratic government with easy access to cheap labor can do.

6. Javelin!!!!!!!
How is this sport still legal?? It's one human, throwing a spear towards other humans. Seriously. A javelin competition is one strong breeze away from turning into a bloodbath. Fingers crossed.

7. Four Years Until Next Olympics!!!*
*We do realize there will be Winter Olympics in 2010, but those don't really count, do they?

FindSportsNow - Easily impressed by a dragon and The Pump.
Posted by Aaron Zimroth on August 4, 2008 at 4:27pm.
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